Rudeness on the road leads to frustration
Make it a point to be considerate of others especially when behind the wheel
By Caroline Neeley Special to the Acorn

I stopped the other day, as I do so often, to allow a driver to pull in front of me. Now, I'm not of the attitude that one gives kindness only to get a thankyou, but it would be nice once in a while. It seems, though, the more grace and courtesy I show, the less acknowledgement I receive for my acts of kindness.

I've also noticed in drivers an increasing lack of consideration for others. Case in point: waiting for the parking space closest to the door, completely oblivious that they're blocking the lane.

Oh, don't worry about the drivers behind you; I'm sure they don't mind the inconvenience. Naw, they have nothing better to do all day than wait for you to be accommodated.

What's happening? Am I too old-school or maybe too old in the head to believe that chivalry and having good manners still exist? After all, I'm not living in the '60s or '70s any more, a time when my father wouldn't have thought twice about rattling my knuckles if I showed even a smidgen of rudeness and my feet never touched the ground as my mother hustled me back to my shared bedroom.

I'm sure most of you will agree that you were not raised to behave selfishly or as if you were entitled to more than your share. In fact, I would bet that if you showed any hint of a gimme that, it's mine attitude, your parents would have knocked you into next week. Yet, it seems to me that people today want what they want and they want it now regardless of who they run over or push aside to get it.

I reached my breaking point the other day and made the choice to finally speak out to a lady who did not acknowledge my graciousness when I allowed her to cut in front of me. Unafraid of possible confrontation, I attracted her attention and motioned for her to roll her window down, where-upon I reminded her, with a smile and a nonconfrontational, calm voice to "next time, acknowledge and or say 'thank you' when someone shows you an act of kindness." I went on to say how good it makes everyone feel.

Well, if looks could kill I wouldn't be sharing my experience with you today. She promptly drove off, mouthing potty words and, of course, flipping me the bird.

What is that? I show kindness she doesn't acknowledge; I show concern, and she gives me the bird? Do people have no decency and dignity left?

Laziness, entitlement and self-servingness manifest intop essimism,which breeds cynicism, and that's not good for the psyche.

C'mon folks, you're better than that! Selfish, inconsiderate behavior can only be defeated when it's pointed out.

However, it can be risky business voicing one's opinion; what you might get in return, just as I did, is a mouthful of foul language and defensive behavior, which, by the way, is an acknowledgement of one's own faults.

But it's only words; remember: "sticks and stones."

Look at 2008 as the year to start over, resurrect the real you, show everyone what you're made of . . . grace, consideration and courtesy. It's not hard to achieve, plus it has lots of feelgood moments.

Caroline Neeley is a conflict negotiator, anger management counselor and motivational speaker. She can be reached at (805) 484-5134.